Fight Fire with Fire: How to Claim your Feminine Power Spot and Not Get Burned
(4) Comments
By Kristi Olson

As a woman, especially a woman entrepreneur, you have incredible power to be in control of your business, your life, your money, your relationships, and yes, even your own success and happiness.  However you define those things, you alone have the power to control the outcome.  It's when we choose not to use our power, either consciously or unconsciously, that we inadvertently turn over our power to someone else.

 

If we give our power over to another person or a circumstance in our business or life, we find ourselves lost in thoughts and actions not of our own making.  We become powerless, and when we lose the power of choice, we lose the freedom to live out our life the way we were meant to:  full of abundant choices, peace, happiness and joy.

 

For some of us, it's time to take our power back or find our power spot.  That place where we can authentically live out the life we set out to live, and make course corrections along the way without feeling the fear of guilt, remorse, or retribution.  Here are four ways you can begin to reclaim your feminine power and not get burned in the process:

 

Power is freedom, and having freedom is all about having choices.  When you operate your business and life from the perspective of always having a choice, you win.  The power of the freedom to choose means just that.  Make a choice, and go with it.  Figure it out along the way if you have to, but just make the choice to move forward in some small way, one thing at a time.  Don't allow yourself to become overwhelmed with Choice #20 when you haven't even made a decision on Choice #1 on your list.

 

Be yourself, feminine and fabulous.  As a woman who has worked in the corporate world, I have personal experience with this.  On too many occasions I felt like I had to suppress the uniquely feminine way I wanted to approach a problem in the workplace, or had to fit the mold of a male-dominated industry when seeking solutions.  It was frustrating and I often felt I had two choices: to become invisible or to become overtly aggressive, and nothing in the middle.

 

Being fully feminine, in my opinion, requires a unique combination of both the feminine and the masculine.  We need the masculine elements of strategies and systems, yet can also incorporate the feminine in how we navigate relationships, lead and mentor others, along with a strong spirit of collaboration and connection.  When we bring our feminine essence, our fabulous inner strength and charm, and our innate interpersonal skills to the table, our inner light sparkles even brighter.

 

Learn to speak up and then shut up.  Women have a tendency to refrain from asking for what they really want or need.  We choose to be silent at times and shy away from conflict and confrontation so as not to disrupt the status quo.  Women are also hesitant to negotiate, especially when it involves money or asking for the sale.  You need to learn to speak up, not complain, and ask specifically for what you need.

 

Then you need to learn when to shut up.  Yes, I said shut up.  Ask for what you need or want, and then be silent.  Don't tell a story about why you asked for what you wanted.    There is no need to overexplain, apologize, or justify your existence.  Stop talking and let the other person respond to your request.  Silence is golden, so don't be feel like you need to fill in the void with idle chatter.  Be unshakeable in your request, and you will be unstoppable in life.

 

Finally, fight fire with fire.  Sometimes you just need to disrupt and confront the people or things that are no longer working out for you in order to turn everything rightside up again.  Light a fire under the things that are burning up your time, your finances, your relationships or your life.  If you don't show up, claim your feminine power spot, and deal with your issues head on, you may wind up getting burned in the process.  Become all consuming in your effort to clean up what needs to be cleaned up, and throw out what needs to be thrown out.  It's time.  Don't delay the inevitable.  A fire unattended can rapidly grow out of control.

 

It's a new season for women entrepreneurs and women in business.  And just like you know how to tell a change in the weather is coming, don't tell me you can't tell a change in the world is coming.  It's a new collaboration and partnership between the feminine and the masculine.  It's a season of claiming your power and leaving your unshakeable mark on the world.  Stop talking and start doing.  Now go out and start your own fire in life and business.

Comments
By amatterofbalance
June 21, 2012 at 11:56am
AMEN Sister!!!!! You were right on. We make excuses for what we want rather than it being natural to want it as strongly as men in business. Having a blend of the masculine and feminine is a perfect way to approach business.
By Gaye
June 21, 2012 at 12:05pm
Hi, Kristi - Your article was motivating...and reminded me of several good success strategies. In particular, the importance of speaking up and shutting up! Thanks for the great reminder.
By Sparkle
June 22, 2012 at 01:23pm
Gaye, thanks for the feedback. I'm glad you found it motivating. That is high praise from you! Even though we have heard things before, it's always good to get a little reminder of what works now & then. Right?
By Sparkle
June 22, 2012 at 01:25pm
amatterofbalance: I agree, having a blend of both masculine and feminine is a win win approach to business success, and to life! Thanks for reading.
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